So… This morning, I feel blue.
I am trying to fold a batch of laundry but cannot figure out how to get the laundry down from the dryer into the living room. I need to ask for help ALL THE TIME. And, I hate asking for help. There are so many things I am used to doing on my own which I cannot quite achieve right now…reaching to get a bottle of aspirin that I left upstairs, getting upstairs to take a bath, getting plasters upstairs to heal Emilie’s injury. I think I need to organize the way things are placed in the house to maximize my ability to be self-sufficient. Because if I do not feel self-sufficient, I am unhappy.
I will therefore create a complete medical kit downstairs and should anything go wrong, I would not need to climb upstairs (crawl) to retrieve the required drugs and/or bandages.
I will also make sure the batch of laundry is close to me so that I might fold it during the day and feel I am contributing around the house.
I guess it sounds pretty cool to be waited on hand and foot, to be indulged in your every whim. It is pretty cool when you can indulge your own whims and then you decide to sit back and let others indulge you. But, when the support is required, you are being nursed not spoilt. It is both endearing and frustrating. But, now is not the time to be proud. I need help, I need to ask for help and to be happy to receive the help.
Today, it is a little harder to put the pride aside. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a little easier.